THE STEPS · STEP THREE
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
IN PLAIN WORDS
The step where we stop directing the play.
Step Three is a decision, not a performance. The Book describes each of us as an actor who wants to run the whole show — arranging the lights, the scenery, the other players — certain that if everyone would just follow our script, life would be wonderful. It never was.
This step is where we resign as director. And notice the four words the founders fought to include: as we understood Him. Our conception of a Higher Power is ours to name, ours to change, and nobody else's business.
The decision is the thing — the wording, the Book says, is quite optional.
HOW IT WORKS · BIG BOOK, PP. 60–63
Where we get stuck
“Turn over my whole life?”
The decision comes first; the letting go comes daily. We only had to be willing to start.
“Whose God, exactly?”
Ours. As we understood Him — the four most freeing words in the Book. Our conception, our words.
“What if I'm not ready?”
Fear is normal here. Many of us made this decision scared. Some of us made it with another person in the room.
THE STEP THREE TOOL
Work Step Three
An honest look at where running the show has gotten us, a Higher Power in our own words, and a decision — made only if and when we're ready.
🛡 Free · No account · Nothing is saved or stored
What a sponsor would ask
“How is being the director of everyone and everything working out for you?”
“Describe a Higher Power you could actually turn something over to — in your words, not anyone else's.”
“What's one thing — just one — you could let go of today?”
From the literature
Big Book · pp. 58–63
Big Book · pp. 60–62
Big Book · p. 63
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions · pp. 34–41
Opens with the essay's own image of a key of willingness.
Read more about this book at aa.org
The Third Step Prayer, on its own page →
Step Four is waiting — and its tool is already here.
Continue to Step Four →